Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

CBT Page

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How To Find In Person Therapy Near Me

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How To Find In Person Therapy Near Me

Finding a therapist who is the right fit for you can be a challenging task to say the least. Now, when you try to find an in-person therapist near you, it may be extra harder. A therapist in Hoboken can give you expert mental health advice as well as a space where you feel safe and genuinely supported as a client and human being. With many therapy options available, finding a therapist near me who aligns with your needs, such as your area of concern or type of therapy you are seeking, and schedule can feel stressful. Whether you are dealing with anxiety, career stress, relationship issues, trauma, or are simply seeking personal growth, mental health counseling can be a tool for powerful transformation and self-improvement. 


Starting the search for the right therapist can seem daunting, particularly if you do not know where to start your therapist search or how to filter through your options of counselors. It can first be important to understand your own preferences when it comes to finding a psychotherapist, from specialization to treatment approach. Knowing what is most important to you will help make the search a little easier and ensure that you find a therapist that truly fits your needs. For extra support with this process, check out our blog “How to Find The Best Therapist Near Me.”

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How To Not Cancel Plans When You Are Feeling Anxious

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How To Not Cancel Plans When You Are Feeling Anxious

At one point or another, we have all been there. Research shows that 19.1% of United States adults have had an anxiety disorder in the past year. You made plans that sounded fun and exciting but, now, the nerves are starting to set in. Maybe it is a date with a potential love interest. Perhaps it is attending a party where you do not know many people. Suddenly, the idea of going out and staying true to your commitment feels overwhelming. Whether you are just generally looking to avoid discomfort or you have a fear of social situations, anxiety can make you feel like pressing send on the “Sorry I can’t make it tonight” text message and hiding under your blanket. 


However, consider this- what if you did not let anxiety dictate your life? If you struggle with wanting to cancel plans last minute due to anxiety, rest assured that there are practical tips available to help you navigate your anxious emotions and stay committed to your plans without feeling overwhelmed. From mindset shifts to healthy coping skills, you can show up for yourself and other people.

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How Does Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) Affect You Mentally?

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How Does Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) Affect You Mentally?

Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, simply referred to as PCOS, is a hormonal disorder that impacts women who are of reproductive age. While the cause of PCOS is not well known, we do know that it causes enlarged ovaries with small cysts on the outer edges. Health experts believe a combination of genetic and environmental factors are at play with this disorder. 

The effects of PCOS are still being studied, but we know that those with the disorder can experience a wide range of mental health concerns, from anxiety and depression to eating disorders and low self-esteem. Continue reading this blog to figure out how PCOS may be impacting you mentally and emotionally, and what you can do to cope.

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What conditions may be treated with CBT therapy near me?

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What conditions may be treated with CBT therapy near me?

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, often simply referred to as CBT, is a type of structured talk therapy that is structured and goal-oriented. Mental health professionals, from psychologists to psychotherapists and counselors, use CBT to treat or manage a range of mental health conditions and/or emotional concerns. 


If you are someone who is starting off in your journey of trying to find a therapist near you, you likely have come across CBT therapy. For support in this journey, read “How to Find the Best Therapist Near Me.” CBT is often referred to as the gold standard of mental health counseling as it is one of the most common and best-studied forms of mental health therapy.

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How Can I Stop Worrying About My Health?

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How Can I Stop Worrying About My Health?

Hypochondriasis, also known as Illness Anxiety Disorder (IAD) or simply health anxiety, is worrying that you are or will become extremely ill. Accompanying your worries, you may or may not have physical symptoms. Or, you may believe that minor symptoms or typical bodily sensations are cause for concern as they may be signs of a severe illness.

For example, you may associate fatigue with a specific, serious illness rather than the result of a not-so-great night’s rest. The health anxiety you are experiencing, not the physical symptoms, can cause significant distress which impacts your daily life and ability to function. Health anxiety may increase as we age into adulthood and become a senior citizen, and/or it may increase during periods of high stress. Luckily, therapy for health anxiety can help put your mind at ease.

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The Hidden Impact of Body Image on Your Well-Being

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The Hidden Impact of Body Image on Your Well-Being

Effects of Body Image on well being

In today's fast-paced, media-saturated world, body image has become a significant concern for many individuals. Our perception of our bodies can profoundly impact our mental health, affecting our self-esteem, relationships, and overall quality of life. Many people with poor body image also struggle with anxiety, depression, and turn to unhealthy coping skills to numb these feelings. Body image can vary over time and change throughout an individual’s life and there are many contributing factors. This blog explores the concept of body image, its effects on mental health, and strategies for fostering a positive body image.

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What Is My Subconscious Trying To Tell Me In My Dreams?

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What Is My Subconscious Trying To Tell Me In My Dreams?

Our external experiences inform our internal experiences. Our experiences in the real world go on to inform our beliefs and general understanding of the complex workings of the world. Dreams often mirror our reality, including the highlights of our life as well as our fears and anxieties. 

We are usually not in control of our dreams. Some dreams may include butterflies and rainbows while other dreams feel very realistic, such as a mundane day at work or school. Dreams are a unique form of communication. Especially when a dream feels clear or real, it can feel like your subconscious is trying to convey a message. When a dream feels outlandish, you may question if there is really an underlying message or meaning after all.

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Why Do I Get Anxiety In The Summer?

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Why Do I Get Anxiety In The Summer?

As many of us know, weather and the changing of seasons can certainly affect our mood. Dark skies and cold temperatures that plague the winter doom can trigger Seasonal Affective Disorder, also known as SAD, and depression. If you are struggling with this, check out our blog “What is Seasonal Affective Disorder and How Is It Treated?”. 

While many people, especially children and teens, look forward to the summer months, warm weather can negatively affect people too. Summer anxiety is a major issue that many people can deal with. By working with an anxiety therapist at Anchor Therapy, you can overcome your anxious thoughts and make the most out of your summer!

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What Leads To Depression In A Person?

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What Leads To Depression In A Person?

Depression is a complex mental health condition. It can occur for a variety of reasons as there is no one specific, universal cause or trigger. Some people may experience situational or temporary depression after a major life transition, such as a move or the death of a loved one. If you have a family history of depression, you may feel sad or lonely for no apparent reason.

Depression is characterized by persistent feelings of sadness. It can change how you think, eat, sleep, and behave in daily life. There are several types of depression- Major Depressive Disorder (MDD), Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), Postpartum Depressive Disorder (PDD), Persistent Depressive Disorder (PDD), Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD), and more. Depression can be treatable by working with a depression therapist.

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How to Cope with Postpartum OCD

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How to Cope with Postpartum OCD

While many of us have heard of the baby blues and Postpartum Depression (PPD), there are other mental health challenges that women can face after birth. For more information, check out our blog “The Difference Between Baby Blues and Postpartum Depression.” 

One of the lesser known mental health disorders women experience after birth is Postpartum Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). Postpartum OCD is similar to OCD that any other child, teen, adult, or senior citizen else can experience, but it also involves thoughts and behaviors specifically about your newborn baby. 

You do not have to struggle with Postpartum OCD on your own. If you believe you are struggling from Postpartum OCD, it is recommended to seek the support of an OCD specialist as soon as possible so you can get the professional care you deserve.

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Can PTSD Cause Memory Loss?

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Can PTSD Cause Memory Loss?

If you suffer with memory issues, you are not alone. Memory loss is extremely common for people struggling with trauma, especially Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). PTSD can impact many facets of your life- emotionally, cognitively, and physically.

One lesser-well known PTSD symptom that people do not often talk about is memory loss. This can include both short-term and long-term memory. There is a direct link between PTSD and memory loss. Lifestyle changes and working with a trauma therapist can help. Keep reading for more information!

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How to Talk to People When You Have Social Anxiety

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How to Talk to People When You Have Social Anxiety

Have you ever been in a social situation where you did not know what to say to someone? Perhaps a situation where awkward silence filled the air? If you struggle with Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD), then you know just how difficult small talk can be. 

At times, you may get in your own way when it comes to conversing with other people. Social anxiety and your insecurities can lead you to avoid social situations altogether. You may think that your opinions do not matter, or you cannot add any meaningful comments to a discussion. Over time, you can learn to become vulnerable, and connect with the people around you.

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How to Deal with Trust Issues

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How to Deal with Trust Issues

Trust refers to the ability to rely on someone, encompassing that person’s character, strength, and ability to tell the truth. For any relationship to be secure and healthy, trust lays the groundwork. However, things can get in the way which makes trust difficult to achieve in a relationship. Sometimes, trust may not be genuine or present at all.

If one or both partners in a romantic relationship have trust issues, it could lead to them questioning the words and actions of their significant other frequently. Trust issues can also affect you individually, preventing you from stepping out into the romantic world and dating again.

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5 Ways to Nurture Your Mind-Body Connection

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5 Ways to Nurture Your Mind-Body Connection

Traditionally, emotional experiences have been largely viewed as completely separate from one’s physical sensations. Clearly, there are some ailments that are entirely physical in nature, such as a broken bone. But, there are some medical concerns that can be linked to stress, anxiety, and additional mental health issues.

The mind-body connection is a powerful force. In a perfect world, the mind and body would always be allies who work together in harmony, but the reality of the situation may not be as clear or perfect. In actuality, the mind and body can sometimes work against each other and the relationship between the two can turn into a confusing one.

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4 Ways To Build A Habit That Sticks

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4 Ways To Build A Habit That Sticks

The process of building a habit, also referred to as habit formation, is a journey where our behaviors become automatic. Habits can be formed consciously or unconsciously. For example, think of when you first wake up in the morning and you go to reach for your phone- this is likely an unconscious habit. On the other hand, your habit of going for a walk every day is a conscious choice you make. 

Habits can be created or erased to suit your needs and, ultimately, to help you reach your goals. Habits play an extremely important role in your health and well-being. Staying consistent and committed will help you form new habits regardless of how long the journey itself might take you!

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Embracing Independence: Tools for Overcoming Dependency

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Embracing Independence: Tools for Overcoming Dependency

Codependency refers to an unhealthy relationship dynamic where one person is the “giver” while the other person is the “taker.” The “giver” gives up their own needs and sense of welfare to please their partner. It is important to note that codependency does not just occur in romantic relationships, it can occur in other dynamics as well, including familial connections. Think of parent and child relationships and connections with friends.

Codependency can be a learned behavior that is passed down from one generation to another. For instance, your parents may have been in and modeled a codependent relationship and you learned that is the way to form a romantic connection. Codependency is a behavioral and emotional condition that impacts your ability to foster a healthy, satisfying connection with another person. 

People often refer to codependency as a relationship addiction. People who struggle with codependency often form or maintain relationships that are one-sided, emotionally destructive, and even abusive in some cases. 

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How to Regulate Your Emotions

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How to Regulate Your Emotions

If you have said or done something at one point in your life and regretted it, you may have done it in the heat of a moment where your emotions got the best of you. A big part of self-regulation is being able to think before you act.

While the roots of emotional regulation are in childhood, emotional self-regulation is thought to get easier as you age into your teenage years and, eventually, adulthood. Keep reading to find out tips for self-regulation.

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Navigating Train and Subway Anxiety: A Commuter’s Guide from Hoboken and Jersey City to New York City

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Navigating Train and Subway Anxiety: A Commuter’s Guide from Hoboken and Jersey City to New York City

Fear of crime on public transportation is a big concern in a lot of cities throughout the United States and, as Hoboken and Jersey City commuters understand, New York City is no exception to this phenomenon. With constant news coverage highlighting the fear-inducing stories of physical violence occurring in the city, anxiety and stress levels naturally spike.

When you are on-edge, it may feel like every little thing is enhancing your anxiety from the screech of the train on the tracks to the sea of faces you see passing you by. There are many intricacies of train and subway anxiety that a Hoboken or Jersey City commuter can experience on their journey into New York City. Continue reading this blog to learn about the contributing factors of public transportation anxiety and how to apply practical strategies to navigate your anxiety concerns with strength!

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Do Affirmations Really Work?

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Do Affirmations Really Work?

Let us face the truth of the matter- sometimes standing in front of a mirror and telling yourself all of these really wonderful things when it does not match how you are feeling inside seems pointless. There is an obvious disconnect in the moment; however, affirmations do promote self-confidence over an extended period of time and usage. For more information, read “5 Ways to Build Self-Confidence.”

Affirmations are an effective way to manage and alter any unhelpful and/or negative thoughts or behavior patterns you may be experiencing. During challenging times, affirmations can enhance your self-esteem and confidence. By using affirmations daily, you will begin to conquer your fears and self-sabotaging tendencies as well as mitigate your stress and anxiety.

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5 Ways to Beat Gym Anxiety

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5 Ways to Beat Gym Anxiety

When you start working out in a new environment, you may experience gym anxiety. As a child or teen, gym anxiety may manifest as being afraid of going to physical education class. As an adult, you may be afraid to try out a new workout or even go to a group workout class with other people.

If you suffer from Social Anxiety Disorder, simply referred to as SAD, your fear of going to the gym or going to physical education class may be so serious that you are constantly thinking about it throughout the day. You may have knots in your stomach about the mere thought of going to the gym after work, triggering your SAD symptoms. For more information read “6 Helpful Tips for Living with Social Anxiety.” It could even lead to a panic attack. For support, check out our blog “How to Manage A Panic Attack.”