lgbtq

The Impact of Trauma on LGBTQIA+ Lives

The Impact of Trauma on LGBTQIA+ Lives

For many people within the LGBTQIA+ community, the journey of identity acceptance is intertwined with unique celebrations and challenges alike. Unfortunately, for many people in the LGBTQIA+ community, trauma is a common experience that ranges from rejection and discrimination to systematic oppression. Every person’s story is different and the impact of trauma can leave great marks on one’s self-esteem, relationships, and overall mental health and well-being. Recognizing how the experiences in your life affected you is the first step to healing.


Trauma in the LGBTQIA+ population is typically rooted in external pressures to conform to the norms of society. Bullying, family rejection, workplace discrimination, and religious condemnation are just some examples of negative LGBTQIA+ experiences that can create deep emotional scars. There are also systemic barriers in place, from exclusion in certain spaces to a lack of access to affirming care, that can worsen these effects. Even microaggressions can create an ongoing sense of alienation. There are very specific challenges at play for marginalized communities, particularly those in the LGBTQIA+ community.


Understanding the impact of trauma on LGBTQIA+ people is important to create a sense of resilience and carve a path to healing. Particularly with LGBTQIA+ youth, only 4% of people in this community reported never having experienced any symptoms of trauma according to the Trevor Project. With a LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist at Anchor Therapy, you both can create a space where you are seen, valued, and safe.

How to Support Your Child After They Come Out

How to Support Your Child After They Come Out

If your child or teen comes out to you, how you react deeply matters. Raising children does not come with a manual or how-to guide. It is okay to not know how to react in every and all situations- you have to do what feels right for you and your family

If your child turns to you to reveal that they are LGBTQIA+ and are ready to come out, it is a great sign of trust that they can confide in you for something like this. This is a great sign showcasing their comfort level with you! But even so, you may have some questions or you may be wondering exactly how you should react. There are steps you can take to ensure that you are building a safe, inclusive home for your LGBTQIA+ child or teen.

4 Common Mental Health Struggles that LGBTQIA+ College Students Face

4 Common Mental Health Struggles that LGBTQIA+ College Students Face

The month of June has been dedicated to celebrating the LGBTQIA+ community. This is a time where inclusion, acceptance, and expression of oneself are all emphasized and flaunted. Fun, colorful, vibrant celebrations, outfits, and parades take place nationwide during this month. 

As a society we have made great strides since the Stonewall Uprising which was the very incident that initiated marches in support of the community and equal rights that then blossomed into pride celebrations throughout the month of June. It is significant to consider that the younger members of the LGBTQIA+ community are experiencing a different reality than previous generations, even when there are unique challenges endured by most that are associated with being LGBTQIA+ in college. 

The support of our society during this time becomes very apparent from the first day of the month when companies change their logos to include the rainbow flag. Whole clothing lines are created plastered with the rainbow flag. Certain products are even rebranded to broadcast the colors that reflect the spectrum of human sexuality and gender as well as the diversity of members within the LGBTQIA+ community. Whether they are genuine or not, these gestures are far more positive than the previous outwardly homophobic undertones many of the leading institutions in our country projected in campaigns and advertisements that reflected their social beliefs. These efforts can be appreciated by members of this community that are immersed in the community and frequently exposed to pop culture hot topics, like college students who identify as LGBTQIA+. 

What You Need To Know To Find A Gender-Affirming Therapist

What You Need To Know To Find A Gender-Affirming Therapist

A person’s sex is usually assigned at birth. It is primarily determined by external genitalia, but other factors, such as hormones, chromosomes, and internal organs, can serve as a confirmation. At birth, newborns are labeled as male or female and, in some unique situations, as intersex. 

One’s gender identity refers to the subjective sense that a person has that they are male, female, or other. A person’s gender identity is determined by their brain rather than their sexual anatomy. It is agreed upon that most children have a sense of their gender identity by the age of four years old, although it may occur earlier or later in life depending on the individual. 

You may feel like the gender assigned to you at birth does not fit you. Maybe you feel uncomfortable about certain gender stereotypes. Perhaps you struggle with parts of your body. Whatever the cause for concern is, your feelings surrounding your gender are valid.


In the beginning, you may have more questions than answers, and that is okay. Luckily, a LGBTQIA+-affirming therapist can assist you throughout your gender transition, affirming you each step of the way.

How LGBTQIA+ Couples Counseling Is Unique

How LGBTQIA+ Couples Counseling Is Unique

Are you in a LGBTQIA+ relationship and experiencing frequent conflicts or disagreements in your relationship? Do you and your partner struggle with meaningful connection, infidelity, or lack of intimacy? Are you in need of a LGBTQIA+ couples therapist who is culturally competent and understands LGBTQIA+ issues? If so, keep reading this article!

Couples counseling can benefit any couple at any time, but it can be especially beneficial for LGBTQIA+ couples who face a unique set of challenges. Therapeutic work in the LGBTQIA+ community is different. Typically, the focus of couples counseling, particularly in the media, can be centered around heterosexual, monogamous couples. The lack of representation you may witness is no need to stop you from seeking the help your relationship deserves and needs.

You may feel stuck in your relationship at the moment. For example, your partnership may look very different from what you envisioned for yourself. You may have issues surrounding communication or need to learn how to work collaboratively to tackle life issues. Like many other couples, when you avoid these behaviors, they can turn into patterns that negatively affect your relationship in the long-run. These patterns can manifest as daily fights or chronic silent treatments.

Whether you and your partner are battling intimacy issues, exploring the possibility of an open relationship, or dealing with the aftermath of infidelity, these situations can breed excess stress, anxiety, and the weakening of a connection for any couple. When you couple these problems with identity-specific struggles, the setbacks can worsen the quality of your relationship, making LGBTQIA+ couples therapy that much more necessary.

How to Support Your LGBTQIA+ Family Member and Become An Ally

How to Support Your LGBTQIA+ Family Member and Become An Ally

Generally, many people know that June is Pride Month. However, you may not know what it means exactly. Simply, Pride Month is a movement for people in the LGBTQIA+ community and allies to celebrate differences while promoting equal rights. It is a time when those in the LGBTQIA+ community celebrate the freedom they have to be themselves.

Gender identity and sexual orientation are acknowledged, honored, and, most importantly, accepted. Celebrating Pride Month as an ally can be important for those in the LGBTQIA+ community since it signals love and acceptance by non-LGBTQIA+ people as a whole.

5 Ways to Support your LGBTQIA+ Teen

5 Ways to Support your LGBTQIA+ Teen

A member of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersex, and Asexual (LGBTQIA+) community, particularly a teenager, is vulnerable to feeling unsafe and unwelcome in many environments. For your teenager to grow healthily, parental support is needed. In other words, the home and family unit should be a safe space for your LGBTQIA+ teen to be themselves and feel encouraged. Regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation, all teenagers want to feel loved and accepted by their parents. Given the numerous societal challenges that an LGBTQIA+ teen must go through, parental support becomes even more important.

Couples Counseling: 7 Types Of Relationships That Can Benefit From Therapy

Couples Counseling: 7 Types Of Relationships That Can Benefit From Therapy

Are you feeling like you are growing apart in your relationship, bickering over small things, or just becoming more frustrated and impatient with one another? Are arguments occurring more frequently and more intensely?

All relationships experience arguments, but at times navigating through the conflict may seem more and more challenging. We find ourselves falling into communication cycles that we cannot seem to break out of and we don’t know what to do differently. On top of it, the pandemic is amplifying tensions and bringing out those underlying cracks in our relationship. We keep trying to struggle through it with our partners, but are finding ourselves feeling increasingly frustrated, angry and exhausted.

Whether your relationship could just use a tune up or you are feeling desperate for change, couples counseling can be the tool that helps get you what you need in your relationship. Seeking help earlier in the process is a benefit because unhealthy behaviors can be more difficult to change as time passes (but never impossible!). We all have behaviors we can work on and therapy can give us the opportunity to work on ourselves while also developing a better understanding of our spouse or partner(s).

How LGBTQ+ Teens Benefit From Virtual Support Groups

How LGBTQ+ Teens Benefit From Virtual Support Groups

Our LGBTQ+ Teen Group is our most popular support group for a reason. Most teens could use extra support from their peers to relate to and see that they are not alone in their struggles. Teens who identify as LGBTQ+ have a higher level of mental health issues and are in need of more support, acceptance, and guidance. When someone is questioning their identity, it is typically hard to know what to do about the possibility of coming out to others or how to process what they are feeling. Being in a group can help teens not only get support from likeminded peers, but it can also help them explore themselves more and find out who they truly are. A LGBTQ+ specific group provides the safe space needed to build a teen’s confidence.

How To Reclaim Your Work-Life Balance During COVID-19 [Part 2]

How To Reclaim Your Work-Life Balance During COVID-19 [Part 2]

A lot of people are having difficulty finding a balance between work life and personal life when operating both from the same space. As working from home continues for most due to COVID-19, this ever-looming concern becomes more and more apparent. While most people did not expect to work from home for this long, it is likely to continue for a longer period of time. As a mental health professional, I list some tips that i tell my clients which can also help you make it through this difficult time.

Anchor Therapy Is Expanding Counseling Services in Hoboken, NJ!

Anchor Therapy Is Expanding Counseling Services in Hoboken, NJ!

At Anchor Therapy, located in Hoboken, NJ, we are currently accepting new clients and are now providing telehealth (video & phone) sessions for residents of New Jersey and New York.

How To Reclaim Your Work-Life Balance During COVID-19

How To Reclaim Your Work-Life Balance During COVID-19

Over the last few months I have been hearing one issue time and time again for many, if not all, of my clients attending therapy who are working from home: the difficulty between finding a balance between work life and personal life when operating both from the same space. As we approach the 6th month of working from home due to COVID-19, this ever-looming concern becomes more and more apparent. While most did not anticipate working from home for this long, it seems as if this is a likely reality for many moving forward. (Google just announced their workers would be working from home until summer 2021).

The Top Causes of Depression

The Top Causes of Depression

Depression can impact anyone for a multitude of reasons. There is a lot of research into the cause of depression and there is not just one clear answer. There could be multiple reasons as to why you feel depressive symptoms. These causes can be broken down into two main categories that include biological factors and environmental factors. It is possible that you have one or both of these factors impacting your mood. Below I will discuss what falls under these two categories in detail.

How To Support Your LGBTQ+ Teen

How To Support Your LGBTQ+ Teen

Your pre-teen and teenage years are filled with time of exploring the world and how you fit in it. Identity becomes a huge topic of exploration for most teens. Your teen may be contemplating anything from as simple as their future career goals up to their gender identity or sexual orientation. This is typically a time that you may find your teen to come out to you by identifying as being a part of the LGBTQ+ community. As a parent, no matter how accepting you are, this may come as a surprise to you and it may take some time to process. Once you have processed this new information, you can then take some extra steps to support your teen as they navigate their new identity and grow into an adult.

Tips and Tools to Improve Communication with your Partner through COVID-19

Tips and Tools to Improve Communication with your Partner through COVID-19

When it comes to improving communication in a relationship, it takes more than just talking more to your partner. It is the way you speak, what you say, what they hear, and much more. As previously discussed, healthy and meaningful communication is built in many ways. One of the biggest issues that couples come across when communicating is oversimplifying it to the belief that one person talks and the other listens. Sure, in some way this is true, but communicating is an active skill and both the speaker and person listening need to be engaged and attuned.

Communicating with Your Partner through COVID-19

Communicating with Your Partner through COVID-19

As a couple’s therapist, the most common issue I see among couples is a breakdown in communication. This does not mean that they are unable to communicate, but that their communication no longer makes them feel connected. In a relationship, we all want to feel heard, seen, and understood. This often gets lost in translation, and is even more difficult to repair under the current circumstance. While many are spending more time than ever together during the pandemic, healthy and effective communication can take a back seat to external stressors. It can be hard not to get caught up in talking about the basics: work, kids, to-do lists and so on. If you are looking to improve communication with your partner, you may need to challenge yourself to do something different and outside of your comfort zone. A strong and fulfilling relationship needs a strong foundation, and that foundation is almost always built on healthy communication. In this first blog of a two-part blog series, I will discuss two key types of communication that couples have and the common problems that may arise for each.

9 Normal Human Responses To A Global Pandemic

9 Normal Human Responses To A Global Pandemic

After 2 months of experiencing stay-at-home orders, you may start to find yourself feeling not your normal self. A lot of people feel alone in how they are experiencing the impact of the global pandemic of the spread of COVID-19. While everyone does have a different life experience, we are all experiencing this trauma together. This is an event that is different than anything we have ever gone through before since it is an ongoing situation that is impacting everyone drastically. You may have experienced a loss in your job, a loved one, or you are isolated from others. Parents have become home school teachers while trying to continue to maintain their own jobs if possible. This is a time to survive and not to thrive. It is okay to not feel your best self or your most productive right now. Below are some things that you may feel during this pandemic that are completely normal to experience at this time and some ways how to help yourself.

11 Tips To Working From Home If You Have Anxiety or Depression

11 Tips To Working From Home If You Have Anxiety or Depression

Millions of people experience anxiety and/or depression in their lifetime. Due to the spread of COVID-19, we have been physically isolated from others. This has caused a spike in mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. In addition to these increasing symptoms of anxiety and depression, you are expected to work your full-time job from home (if you are lucky enough that your job allows you to make this transition). It has become difficult to manage your mental health along with this major adjustment of working from home. Below I will go through realistic tips on how you can manage working from home if you are also experiencing any level of anxiety and/or depression.

Tips for Parenting During a Pandemic

Tips for Parenting During a Pandemic

As we enter week 6 of the COVID-19 quarantine in Hoboken, New Jersey, I have noticed how difficult and defeating this time has been for parents. The challenges of parenting during this pandemic can seem endless and insurmountable. Many parents are trying to balance the stress of work, full time care of their children, teaching their children, their own well-being, and mental health with none of the support they once relied upon. Exhausted and overwhelmed, these daily struggles start to build up and make us feel like the light at the end of the tunnel has dimmed or disappeared altogether. With so much uncertainty about the future of the world and your family, anxiety and fear are at an all-time high. This level of pressure combined with the collective unease of society makes it extremely difficult to handle day to day stressors with the same degree of self-control that many feel they once had.

How Couples Are Taking Advantage of Telehealth Counseling during COVID-19

How Couples Are Taking Advantage of Telehealth Counseling during COVID-19

Telehealth has always been a useful tool to provide therapy services to many individuals over the years. It allows those who would otherwise be unable to attend regular sessions access even if their life and schedule make it difficult. During this pandemic of the spread of COVID-19, couples are able to take advantage of this time to start couples counseling and work on their relationship through telehealth sessions. Many are wondering how telehealth works when it comes to couples counseling. As a couples counselor, I have been providing these services through telehealth for years and have found it to be equally effective as in-person sessions. I hope to answer some questions and concerns while also reassuring anyone interested in telehealth during this time of isolation that you can get help regardless of circumstance.