Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

college stress

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Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

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Does ADHD Get Better With Age?

When it comes to Attention-Deficit-Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), many children, teens, and adults may wonder if ADHD challenges will subside with age. Typically, ADHD is associated with children and teens who struggle with focus, impulsivity, and hyperactivity. For more information, read our blog “Parenting A Child With ADHD.” But did you know that ADHD can impact adults as well? To learn more information on this topic, check out our blog “CBT for Adult ADHD.”


ADHD is a lifelong neurodevelopmental condition which means that symptoms can persist into adulthood; however, ADHD symptoms may manifest differently over time. As you grow older, you will often develop healthy coping strategies and skills which can help you manage your ADHD symptoms more effectively. 


For example, as an adult with ADHD you may face less issues surrounding hyperactivity and more concern over focus and organization. Life transitions,career paths, and other environmental factors can influence how ADHD symptoms present over time. That is to say, while ADHD never fully goes away, it can look different and feel more manageable as you get older.

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Balancing Home and College: Navigating Mental Health During Holiday Breaks

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Balancing Home and College: Navigating Mental Health During Holiday Breaks

The Holidays can be a very exciting time. Around the time of the holidays, there is a lot of joy and giving. People are usually in high spirits and excited for the holiday. For college students, this may look different. This is the time when college students are cramming for exams, overwhelmed and stressed, all leading up to going home for winter break. This can take a significant toll on the mental health of students. After finals and moving back into their parent's house, being back in their hometown can be a significant change. With so much going on, not having the chance to sit down and reflect on these changes can result in feelings of anxiety and depression. 


Feeling mentally and physically drained after college semester:

The weeks leading up to going home for winter break can be extremely stressful and mentally taxing. Coming home for winter break can be very exciting but also sad. Although it is the holidays, you are ready to go home and miss your family. Right before going home, you may find yourself staying up late, cramming for your final exams. You may be trying to fit in social time with your friends before you go your separate ways for the break. In just a few short weeks after Thanksgiving break, you may be homesick and feeling burnt out with the end of the semester so close. Jumping back into school after being off for a week and being expected to study and take exams can take a toll on college students. After a long semester and the finish line so close, it can be hard to push yourself to that last stretch.

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How To Mentally Prepare For Going Back To College

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How To Mentally Prepare For Going Back To College

As summer comes to a close, it can be hard to dodge those “back-to-school” commercials and emails flooding our inboxes of purchasing school supplies. You get a daily reminder that your few months of a break is quickly coming to an end. You may have purchased your college textbooks or a new fall wardrobe, but are you really ready to go back? How do you mentally prepare yourself for a new semester or, perhaps, your first time stepping foot on campus as a freshman?

Even though you are registered for classes and have your bag packed with books, pencils, and other supplies, your preparation does not end there. You may feel stressed or anxious like your few months of freedom is coming to an end. Stress, deadlines, homework, and exams will quickly fill up your schedule.

While college can be a stressful experience at times, it can be equally as exciting. The college experience is unique. For some people, it is often regarded as the “best years of their life.” While looking forward to your next year at college, try to view it with as much excitement as you do with nervous anticipation.

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5 Ways I Prioritize My Mental Health In College

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5 Ways I Prioritize My Mental Health In College

My name is Madeline and I am a social media intern here at Anchor Therapy. I am currently a junior in college and it has taken me quite a while to figure out how I can prioritize my mental health. Between taking six classes, working two jobs, and trying to balance friendships and schoolwork, it can be very overwhelming and my mental health often used to take a back seat. I always find myself wanting to do everything I can at the same time to make sure I am having the traditional “college experience” that I have heard about my entire life. This year especially I have been making more of an effort to prioritize my mental health and do what is best for me. Here are my top five tips on how to balance your mental health while being in college.

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How Can CBT Help College Students Struggling with Anxiety?

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How Can CBT Help College Students Struggling with Anxiety?

While college can be a great time for growth, social exploration, and fun, it can also be a time filled with stress. Especially during this time of the year, final exams are in full swing and you may feel like you have a lot on your plate. Whether you are just dealing with the stress of your schoolwork or you are also trying to balance work and other responsibilities, college can easily breed feelings of anxiety.

In addition to your responsibilities, many people struggle with the changes that college can bring about. You are no longer surrounded by your family and friends. Your everyday routine has changed in a big way.

Some common causes of anxiety in college students include:

  • Academic pressure

  • Moving away from home

  • New social situations

  • Financial stressors

Many college students report having anxiety so you are not alone! By learning about your anxiety and working with a therapist who specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, also known as CBT, you can make positive changes in your life and learn how to manage your anxiety!

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Navigating Life After College

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Navigating Life After College

Congratulations on graduating from college! It is undeniably an exciting time in your life. You worked hard for four years and now your dedication has paid off. It is a major accomplishment, and you should be proud of yourself. However, once that diploma is in your hand, you may feel a mixture of emotions- feeling anxious, excited, scared, nervous about your future. If you feel this way, please know that you are not alone and it is completely normal to have these feelings.

Many college students are not prepared for the transition after graduation. Some graduates wish that they would have been more engaged on campus or taken part in different academic and professional opportunities. Other students wish that they would have prepared themselves more for the workforce by participating in an internship or externship. While it is easy to look back and think of what you could have done better, it is important to ground yourself in the present moment and know that you accomplished the ultimate goal- graduating from college.

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5 Effective Ways to Reduce Stress During Final Exams

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5 Effective Ways to Reduce Stress During Final Exams

Every college student knows that final exam week sparks unavoidable stress. Even as students look around their college campus during this time of the semester, you can see that stress taking place in the form of anxiety and sleep deprivation.

Although stress is an inevitable component of life, it can easily take a toll on all aspects of your health- including physical, emotional, and mental health. It can also interfere with your academic success. The stress that college students typically deal with involves alterations in one’s lifestyle, an enlarging workload, new duties, and interpersonal relationships. Finals week can add extra pressure onto this already-stressful situation.