Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

college stress hoboken

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How To Find In Person Therapy Near Me

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How To Find In Person Therapy Near Me

Finding a therapist who is the right fit for you can be a challenging task to say the least. Now, when you try to find an in-person therapist near you, it may be extra harder. A therapist in Hoboken can give you expert mental health advice as well as a space where you feel safe and genuinely supported as a client and human being. With many therapy options available, finding a therapist near me who aligns with your needs, such as your area of concern or type of therapy you are seeking, and schedule can feel stressful. Whether you are dealing with anxiety, career stress, relationship issues, trauma, or are simply seeking personal growth, mental health counseling can be a tool for powerful transformation and self-improvement. 


Starting the search for the right therapist can seem daunting, particularly if you do not know where to start your therapist search or how to filter through your options of counselors. It can first be important to understand your own preferences when it comes to finding a psychotherapist, from specialization to treatment approach. Knowing what is most important to you will help make the search a little easier and ensure that you find a therapist that truly fits your needs. For extra support with this process, check out our blog “How to Find The Best Therapist Near Me.”

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What Is The Main Cause of Insomnia?

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What Is The Main Cause of Insomnia?

Insomnia is when you experience disruptions in how you feel or function because you are not sleeping well or sleeping enough. Insomnia is a very common sleep disorder. In fact, research has shown that roughly 1 in 3 adults worldwide have insomnia symptoms, and roughly 10% of adults meet the criteria for insomnia disorder. Insomnia is typically characterized by difficulties in falling asleep, staying asleep, or waking up too early and failing to fall back asleep.


Insomnia can lead to many physical and mental health problems, from fatigue to mood problems. There are many factors that can contribute to insomnia, but getting to the root cause of your insomnia problems is essential for effective treatment and sleep disorder management. One of the primary culprits of insomnia is anxiety and stress. The pressures of life, from work troubles to relationship issues, can cause your body and mind to enter a heightened state of alertness where it becomes difficult to relax and get ready for sleep.


By identifying the main cause of insomnia, you can be better positioned to make lifestyle changes and seek treatment options to restore peaceful sleep!

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How To Not Cancel Plans When You Are Feeling Anxious

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How To Not Cancel Plans When You Are Feeling Anxious

At one point or another, we have all been there. Research shows that 19.1% of United States adults have had an anxiety disorder in the past year. You made plans that sounded fun and exciting but, now, the nerves are starting to set in. Maybe it is a date with a potential love interest. Perhaps it is attending a party where you do not know many people. Suddenly, the idea of going out and staying true to your commitment feels overwhelming. Whether you are just generally looking to avoid discomfort or you have a fear of social situations, anxiety can make you feel like pressing send on the “Sorry I can’t make it tonight” text message and hiding under your blanket. 


However, consider this- what if you did not let anxiety dictate your life? If you struggle with wanting to cancel plans last minute due to anxiety, rest assured that there are practical tips available to help you navigate your anxious emotions and stay committed to your plans without feeling overwhelmed. From mindset shifts to healthy coping skills, you can show up for yourself and other people.

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4 Ways to Deal with Election Anxiety in 2024

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4 Ways to Deal with Election Anxiety in 2024

Every four years, we get the opportunity to head to the polls and put action behind our voices in choosing the next President of the United States. If it feels like there is a lot of pressure on your shoulders (and your vote), you are not alone. You are making a major decision about the future of your country. What do you want your nation to look like? Do social issues trump financial concerns for you, or vice versa? What is your definition of an ‘ideal America’?

From ongoing political commentary to ruthless banter on social media, it can sometimes be hard to clarify your own values and goals amongst all the noise. If you are feeling anxious about the 2024 United States Presidential Election, you are not the only one. According to the American Psychiatric Association, 73% of United States adults are anxious about the election on top of additional life transitions.

The good news is that, even after the election comes and goes, the world will continue spinning. Your world will continue- you will go to school and/or work, take care of your children and family members, hang out with friends, and so on. But, in the meantime, it is important to reclaim your happiness and peace so your election anxiety does not get the best of you.

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Balancing Home and College: Navigating Mental Health During Holiday Breaks

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Balancing Home and College: Navigating Mental Health During Holiday Breaks

The Holidays can be a very exciting time. Around the time of the holidays, there is a lot of joy and giving. People are usually in high spirits and excited for the holiday. For college students, this may look different. This is the time when college students are cramming for exams, overwhelmed and stressed, all leading up to going home for winter break. This can take a significant toll on the mental health of students. After finals and moving back into their parent's house, being back in their hometown can be a significant change. With so much going on, not having the chance to sit down and reflect on these changes can result in feelings of anxiety and depression. 


Feeling mentally and physically drained after college semester:

The weeks leading up to going home for winter break can be extremely stressful and mentally taxing. Coming home for winter break can be very exciting but also sad. Although it is the holidays, you are ready to go home and miss your family. Right before going home, you may find yourself staying up late, cramming for your final exams. You may be trying to fit in social time with your friends before you go your separate ways for the break. In just a few short weeks after Thanksgiving break, you may be homesick and feeling burnt out with the end of the semester so close. Jumping back into school after being off for a week and being expected to study and take exams can take a toll on college students. After a long semester and the finish line so close, it can be hard to push yourself to that last stretch.

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5 Ways I Prioritize My Mental Health In College

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5 Ways I Prioritize My Mental Health In College

My name is Madeline and I am a social media intern here at Anchor Therapy. I am currently a junior in college and it has taken me quite a while to figure out how I can prioritize my mental health. Between taking six classes, working two jobs, and trying to balance friendships and schoolwork, it can be very overwhelming and my mental health often used to take a back seat. I always find myself wanting to do everything I can at the same time to make sure I am having the traditional “college experience” that I have heard about my entire life. This year especially I have been making more of an effort to prioritize my mental health and do what is best for me. Here are my top five tips on how to balance your mental health while being in college.

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How Can CBT Help College Students Struggling with Anxiety?

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How Can CBT Help College Students Struggling with Anxiety?

While college can be a great time for growth, social exploration, and fun, it can also be a time filled with stress. Especially during this time of the year, final exams are in full swing and you may feel like you have a lot on your plate. Whether you are just dealing with the stress of your schoolwork or you are also trying to balance work and other responsibilities, college can easily breed feelings of anxiety.

In addition to your responsibilities, many people struggle with the changes that college can bring about. You are no longer surrounded by your family and friends. Your everyday routine has changed in a big way.

Some common causes of anxiety in college students include:

  • Academic pressure

  • Moving away from home

  • New social situations

  • Financial stressors

Many college students report having anxiety so you are not alone! By learning about your anxiety and working with a therapist who specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, also known as CBT, you can make positive changes in your life and learn how to manage your anxiety!