Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
love bombing, nyc therapist, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you. 

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Family Counseling Page

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How To Navigate Holiday Planning Stress During A Pandemic

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How To Navigate Holiday Planning Stress During A Pandemic

Normally, the holidays can be a stressful time to plan around different family, friend, and job celebrations. With the COVID-19 pandemic, the stress of the holidays has been at an all time high. With the colder weather approaching along with the holiday season, a lot of people are worried how they will continue to socialize safely with others. The best part about the holiday season is that you are spending time with people you care most about. It is typical to see some family or friends once a year due to the holidays. This year, it is not only hard to travel but it is also stressful to figure out how to plan holiday celebrations while feeling safe.

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Tips for Parenting During a Pandemic

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Tips for Parenting During a Pandemic

As we enter week 6 of the COVID-19 quarantine in Hoboken, New Jersey, I have noticed how difficult and defeating this time has been for parents. The challenges of parenting during this pandemic can seem endless and insurmountable. Many parents are trying to balance the stress of work, full time care of their children, teaching their children, their own well-being, and mental health with none of the support they once relied upon. Exhausted and overwhelmed, these daily struggles start to build up and make us feel like the light at the end of the tunnel has dimmed or disappeared altogether. With so much uncertainty about the future of the world and your family, anxiety and fear are at an all-time high. This level of pressure combined with the collective unease of society makes it extremely difficult to handle day to day stressors with the same degree of self-control that many feel they once had.

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How To Survive The Holidays With Divorced Parents

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How To Survive The Holidays With Divorced Parents

The holidays can be a difficult time for adult children to manage when they have divorced parents. When you are a young adult, you are independent enough to make your own decisions on where and when you want to celebrate with your family. Every family dynamic is different, but there are some common struggles that come up for anyone who has had the experience of jumping between family parties over the holidays.

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How To Talk To Your Child About Death

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How To Talk To Your Child About Death

There comes a time when every parents needs to explain death to their child. School age children will start to learn about death and what happens to people when they die. The comprehension of the finality of death comes later. Hopefully this does not happen in your family, but there may come a time when you are faced with the hardship of telling your child that a close family member has died. Below are some ways to help you talk to your child about death.

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Parenting 101: How To Change Your Child's Behavior

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Parenting 101: How To Change Your Child's Behavior

Most parents who I see in my office in Hoboken, NJ or for online (video/ phone) sessions want help with changing their child's behavior. Most times, parents prefer for me to see just their child and to change their behaviors directly through play therapy. While I do see children and help them change their behaviors through play therapy. I also find working with parents on the side leads to the most successful changes. 

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10 Ways To Help Your Child Calm Down

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10 Ways To Help Your Child Calm Down

Does your child have temper tantrums, feel anxious, and cannot be calmed down? As a parent, do you feel you've tried everything you could to calm your child down? As a psychotherapist in Hoboken, NJ I specialize in helping children and teens express themselves in appropriate ways. I like to teach children self soothing actions they can do on their own at home. 

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7 Ways To Stay Sane When Celebrating the Holidays With Divorced Parents

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7 Ways To Stay Sane When Celebrating the Holidays With Divorced Parents

IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND YOU ARE ALREADY DREADING ALL OF THE TRAVELING YOU ARE GOING TO DO FROM ONE FAMILY MEMBER'S HOUSE TO THE OTHER. AS A YOUNG ADULT, YOU ARE INDEPENDENT TO DO WHATEVER YOU WANT IN YOUR DAILY LIFE. BUT WHEN IT COMES DOWN THE HOLIDAY, IT IS YOUR JOB TO MAKE IT TO ALL OF THE FAMILY PARTIES. WHETHER YOUR PARENTS RECENTLY GOT DIVORCED OR THEY HAVE BEEN DIVORCED SINCE YOU HAVE BEEN IN DIAPERS, THIS LIST IS FOR YOU.

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How Do I Help My Teen Feel Less Overwhelmed?

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How Do I Help My Teen Feel Less Overwhelmed?

When you are a parent of a teen or adolescent in high school, the end of the year can be a stressful time for multiple reasons. As a parent, you might notice that your child, or adolescent, is struggling to juggle college applications, school work, after school activities, and family time. This might be the perfect time to have your child seek out a teen therapist.

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How Do I Get My Teen To Talk To Me?

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How Do I Get My Teen To Talk To Me?

HOW DO I FIND OUT WHAT MY TEEN IS UP TO? WHY IS MY TEEN SLAMMING THE DOOR IN MY FACE? WHY DO THEY ALWAYS RESPOND, "I DON'T KNOW"? WHY DOES MY TEEN TEXT WITH FRIENDS AT ALL HOURS, BUT WILL NOT TALK TO ME?

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