In recent years, a certain group of people known as “empaths” have gained a lot of attention. From social media awareness to the publishing of new books, the term “empaths” has gained a lot of traction. Empaths are said to be people with an extraordinary ability to sense or even absorb the emotions, energies, and moods of other people, experiencing these things as if they were their own. While most people are able to feel and showcase empathy, the heightened sensitivity that empaths have goes beyond normal measure. So the question begs- are empaths real?

The idea of empaths usually comes with much debate and contention, from scientists to conversations around popular culture. Some people may see being an empath as a unique personality trait. Some view it as an extension of deep emotional intelligence. Other people view it as an almost psychic six sense where empaths can tune into energies that most people would not even perceive. Regardless of which side you lean on, empaths do report intense emotional experiences that come to shape their day-to-day functioning and relationships with other people.

Anchor Therapy is a counseling center in Hoboken, NJ with mental health therapists specialized in helping children, teens, adults, couples, and families with anxiety, depression, relationship issues, trauma, life transitions, and more. Anchor Therapy is accepting new clients and is now providing in-person sessions and teletherapy sessions to residents of New Jersey, New York, and Florida.

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What is an empath?

As the name may suggest, an empath is someone who possesses an unusually high amount of empathy for other people which leads them to possess the emotions, energy, and even physical sensations of those around them. Standard empathy involves understanding and sharing another person’s feelings to a certain degree, but an empath takes it to the next step. An empath will actually experience another person’s emotions as if it was his or her own.

Due to this, empaths also have more challenges when compared to the average person. For instance, an empath may report feeling overwhelmed when in crowded places. When someone has an emotional shift, an empath can pick it up, even if it is just based on non-verbal cues. Lastly, an empath may feel compelled to help other people even if it is to their own detriment.

Here are some common traits of an empath:

Intense emotional sensitivity
Overwhelmed in crowds and busy settings
Absorbing other people’s emotions
Deep connection with nature
Strong intuition
Strong need for solitude and alone time to recharge (Read our blog “Find Out If You Are An Introvert or Extrovert”)
Attraction to healing professions (e.g., healthcare, counseling, teaching, etc.)
Highly compassionate and giving
Difficulty with boundaries (Check out our blog “6 Ways to Set Boundaries and Enforce Them”)
Prone to emotional fatigue and burnout

Empaths are understandably highly sensitive to emotions and the “energy” of environments and people. Some empaths claim that they can detect hidden emotions and underlying tensions in people which can make for draining social situations. And because empaths take on the emotions of the people around them, it can be hard for an empath to distinguish between their own emotions and that of other people.

If you are curious to explore whether or not you are an empath, here are some questions you can ask yourself to explore your level of empathy and sensitivity to the emotions and energies of other people:

Do I easily pick up on other people’s emotions?
How do I feel in crowded places or social gatherings?
Do I sometimes feel emotions that are not my own?
Do I feel deeply affected by what is on the news or in books or television?
Do I feel a strong connection to nature and animals?
Do I often feel a strong need to help other people and/or take on their own problems as my own?
Do I often feel like I need to withdraw from other people and be alone?
Have other people called me “too sensitive” or “too emotional”?
Do I feel an intuitive “gut feeling” about certain people and situations?
Do I find it hard to set emotional boundaries?
Do I feel drawn to helping professions or roles?
Do I notice a strong desire for authenticity in relationships?

If you resonate with being an empath, our blog “The Truth About Being An Empath” is a must-read article.

Are empaths born or made?

The question of whether empaths are born or made is rather complex since it comes to both nature, also known as genetics, and nurture, or life experiences. Many medical professionals believe that empathetic traits can come from a combination of innate characteristics and environmental influences. Together, these two factors shape how deeply a human being connects to the emotions and energies of the other people around them.

Some research suggests that people are actually born with increased empathy and sensitivity, meaning that there is a genetic component at play. Studies indicate that this is due to variations in certain genes, specifically those related to oxytocin, a hormone and neurotransmitter that plays an important role in humans, from reproduction to social behavior and emotional attachment. Therefore, this can influence a person’s level of empathy and emotional sensitivity.

It is also believed that empaths may have a higher amount of mirror neurons when compared to the average person. Mirror neurons are a group of brain cells that are believed to be responsible for empathy and compassion. Some research suggests that empaths have a hyperactive mirror neuron system which can explain why they are so attuned to the emotions and experiences of other people. Essentially, mirror neurons work to help us empathize by stimulating the actions and emotions of other people in our own brain. This can literally allow us to put ourselves into the shoes of another person to understand their thoughts and feelings.

On the other hand, it is said that becoming an empath is heavily influenced by a person’s environment. For example, one’s childhood environment is said to play a crucial role in the development of an empath. For instance, think of a child who grows up in an emotionally charged or unpredictable environment. This child may have learned to “read” the emotions of people around them as a survival strategy. Over time, this leads to an increased sense of empathy and attunement to other people’s emotions as an adult.

Additionally, experiencing trauma can enhance one’s sensitivity to emotional cues. Once someone has endured hardships, they may become more sensitive to the suffering of other people. This can happen in one of two ways- as a result of increased emotional awareness or as a coping skill to comprehend and predict the behavior of other people.

Learned compassion is also another way in which empaths may enhance their empathetic skills. Some life experiences can encourage compassion, such as being a caregiver or developing close, emotionally open relationships with other people.

With all of this being said, most empaths likely experience a combination of both genetic predisposition and environmental influences. For instance, someone may be born with a naturally sensitive temperament and, as they encounter other life experiences that reinforce their natural tendencies, they deepen their empathic abilities. However, even someone who was not born with a strong genetic predisposition can still develop empathic traits due to major life events or repeated exposure to empathetic people.

How rare is an empath?

With all of the recent talk about empaths, you may believe that they are more common than they actually are. There is not a universal way to measure whether or not someone is an empath; however, there are a few things we can examine here.

First, we know that empathy exists on a sort of spectrum. Most people fall within a normal range but there are two extremes. The first extreme are individuals who can showcase little to no empathy and this may coexist with a personality disorder. Then, you have those who are highly empathetic, or empaths, on the other end of the spectrum. Research has shown that as little as 1 to 2% of the world’s population would be considered empaths. People who are truly empaths make up a small part of the global population.

Next, Dr. Elaine Aron is a psychologist and researcher who studies sensitivity. Her work is centered around Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs). In the 1990s, she recognized a subset of people who processed sensory data more deeply than other people. According to Dr. Aron’s research, roughly 15-20% of the world’s population would be considered HSPs. This heightened sensitivity can impact many facets of a HSP’s life, from relationships to school and career choices.

Here are some key characteristics of HSPs:

Deep processing of information - HSPs tend to process information more deeply than the average person. They can be reflective, thoughtful, and tend to think every case scenario through very carefully.
High emotional reactivity - HSPs feel their own emotions and the emotions of other people very intensely. For example, a minor act of kindness or a heartfelt quote may make this person tear up. This increased emotional reactivity also makes them very empathetic.
Sensitivity to sensory stimuli - Things like bright lights, loud noises, and chaotic environments can feel very overwhelming to a HSP. Heightened sensory awareness can lead to overstimulation which may make an empath need to withdraw from these kinds of environments.
Easily overwhelmed by complex situations - In a chaotic or demanding setting, a HSP may feel overwhelmed due to their sensitivity to stimuli. To process the intense or fast-paced environments, they may need more space or downtime.
Strong need for alone time and downtime - HSPs usually need a lot of downtime and alone space to recharge after stimulating or emotional experiences. Quietness gives them the space to process and recover from the sensory or emotional input they have absorbed. Having alone time is essential for the well-being of a HSP.

It is believed that NSPs have unique neurological and genetic traits that lead to their increased sensitivity. Just as empaths, NSPs may have more mirror neurons in their brain which increase sensitivity and empathy. This allows NSPs to easily recognize emotions in other people. NSPs may also have enhanced activity in the brain areas connected to awareness and processing of sensory information.

Dr. Aron created the “DOES” Model which helps summarize some main points about NSPs:

D: Depth of processing - A NSP processes things more deeply than the average person
O: Overstimulation - Sensory and emotional input more easily overwhelms a NSP
E: Emotional reactivity and empathy - NSPs are highly empathetic and may respond strongly to both positive and negative emotions
S: Sensitivity to subtleties - A NSP can pick up on things in their environment that most other people would not notice

One important thing to note about NSPs is that not all NSPs are empaths, but many empaths are likely to be NSPs. Being a NSP is all about being attuned to the subtle emotional and sensory information around them which often aligns with how an empath experiences the world.

NSPs and empaths may share many of the same characteristics, but that does not mean that both of these populations are identical.

Here is a breakdown of the differences between NSPs and empaths:

Sensitivity vs absorption of emotions - A HSP can experience heightened sensitivity to external stimuli and emotions, but empaths take it a step further by actually absorbing the emotions of other people.
Focus on emotional vs physical sensitivity - HSPs often have a strong reaction to physical things (e.g., loud sounds, strong smells, etc.) and may be emotionally sensitive as well. Empaths are primarily sensitive to emotional sensitivity instead of physical stimuli.
Neurological basis vs energetic sensitivity - HSPs likely have neurological differences in their brain which shows that the heightened sensitivity is actually linked to genes and a hyperactive nervous system response. The exact cause of empathic abilities is not fully understood although researchers have some theories and evidence.
Emotional contagion and boundaries - HSPs can feel emotionally impacted by other people but they are usually able to maintain some emotional boundaries which gives them the space to distinguish their feelings from the feelings of other people. Alternatively, empaths struggle with boundaries and can confuse their emotions for the emotions of another person.

At Anchor Therapy, we have a team of licensed psychotherapists who understand the nuances of being an empath. If you need support setting boundaries and managing your own emotions, do not hesitate to reach out to us today.

Victoria Scala

is the Social Media Manager, Intake Coordinator, and Community Engagement Director at Anchor Therapy in Hoboken, New Jersey. She is a graduate of the Honors College of Rutgers University-Newark and is currently studying Clinical Mental Health Counseling at the graduate level. In her roles, Victoria is committed to managing the office’s social media/community presence and prioritizing clients' needs.

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