April 10, 2024

Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist

Courtney Glashow

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team.

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk.

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families

December 14, 2022

toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling

Courtney Glashow

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

September 14, 2022

Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling

Courtney Glashow

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right

July 13, 2022

control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling

Courtney Glashow

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

December 8, 2021

couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling

Courtney Glashow

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

How To Re-Ignite The Fire In Your Relationship

How To Re-Ignite The Fire In Your Relationship

Most will remember the feelings of excitement, butterflies, and attraction when they first fall in love with their significant other. In the beginning, everything feels like an adventure when you’re falling in love. The question is how to maintain that spark after years of commitment. Passion at the beginning of a relationship serves a very important purpose, to help you connect, learn about each other, and keep you craving more and more time together. If you notice that over time the intensity you once felt has dimmed, you are not alone!

How To Survive Wedding Planning Stress

How To Survive Wedding Planning Stress

Planning a wedding can be both the best time of your life and the most stressful time of your life. There are always stressors that arise when wedding planning that you don’t expect and it is impossible to predict. When planning a wedding, it is about your love for your partner who you are planning to spend the rest of your life with. But it is also a momentous day that your families and friends feel apart of. This is usually where the stress stems from. You will notice over the course of wedding planning that everyone around you has their own vision and expectation for your wedding. It is important to stay on track with you and your partner’s vision for your wedding and to have a few coping tools in your back pocket for when the stress really starts to build.

Does Coming Out As LGBTQ Ever End?

Does Coming Out As LGBTQ Ever End?

As a psychotherapist in Hoboken, NJ who specializes in seeing lgbtq identified clients, I find that the coming out process never ends- no matter what age or how long ago you first came out. In hoboken and jersey city, there are a lot of accepting groups and people that welcome the lgbtq community. We are also so close to NYC that it makes sense for hudson county to be pretty liberal and accepting of all people- no matter how they identify. While I say I specialize in the LGBTQ community, I really mean that I am accepting of all people and I have experience working with people who identify as something they feel is different than the population “norm”. There are definitely unique hardships that accompany identifying as lgbtq, such as the coming out process. And that process never ends.